Monday, July 1, 2013

20 Stories of the Strangest Places For A Sexual Encounter

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Sometimes when you gotta do it, you gotta do it. We're all just a bunch of mammals and when an Ask Reddit thread popped up inquiring as to "strangest place you have ever done something sexual", you can imagine people came out of the woodworks to share their best. Here are 20 of the best stoies out of well over a hundred submissions.





Via Jimmacat
I was in a minor helicopter crash in Afghanistan. We still followed through with our mission to clear a portion of a village searching for someone and then proceeded to guard the crash site for ~18 hours while it got dismantled and recovered (couldn't just blow it for reasons). 2 hours guarding an alley approaching the crash. Combat jack achieved
I'm going to be in medical school soon. I'll be your doctor one day

Via way_fairer: 
Achievement Unlocked: "Service Yourself While In The Service" (50)

Via Bitastrophe
In houston, tx rush hour traffic like 8 or 9 yrs ago, me and my ex gf went into the trunk through backeat and got it on, during which i pop the kidnap handle and all the traffic saw my bare white ass and honked in approval it was the high point of my sex to date

Via AnAlternativeName

When I was a kid I masturbated in the back seat, sitting upright, while my mom and sister were in the front seat. I had a pillow laying across my lap. I just was driven crazy by the need to play with myself... And after I came, I was unbelievably paranoid and ashamed. As far as I know, they never knew or mentioned it.
I'm a girl, for reference.

Via throwawayjkjk
I fingered my ex in the line for Space mountain at Disneyland.
Actually, I fingered her all over Disneyland now that I think of it

Via record_man


MY gf at the time was from Ottawa so when we went back to visit her parents I wanted to do some of the traditional tourist things, so she suggested a tour, We went and it was very boring, I had to go to the bathroom while on the tour. She decided to go to, we saw a bathroom and went without telling the guide. We got out of the bathroom and guides were gone. She made a joke that since no one was around we should fuck were so many Canadians had been fucked before. I laughed then gave her the why not face and she agreed. We went to one of the pews and had a super quick one. and left before we got caught
Via Danzo-Is-The-Best
My girlfriends gran lives in Alicante, Spain. So one October evening in 2010 we decide to go over and visit her nice little villa.
Now, here's something I did not know about our trip, her gran lived next door to Bono's brother. First night we catch them, and have drinks on their patio (Norman and his wife/girlfriend) lovely people. Turns out they had to leave later that night as he had to visit his brother in Sevilla as U2 were playing a gig there (As if it's a chore to a degree).
So he gives us permission to use his pool whenever we see fit. You know where this is going....
We had sex in the pool of Bono's bro.
It makes me both happy, and sad.

Via happyhamburger

My parents and I were on a road trip. My dad drove, my mom was in the passenger seat, and I was in the back. I don't why but I started looking at porn on my phone. I just get surfing and watching videos (with headphones, of course). Then I started jerking off. Luckily, we had stopped at McDonald's ealier so I finished into napkins. When we stopped at a rest place I made sure I was the one to throw away the McDonald's bag.

Via _from_the_internet
2003 Invasion of Iraq front lines outside an-Nasiriya. We had gone with little to no sleep for days in an intense environment. There was no fun, no joy, just shit. I was on watch at night while everyone else in my fighting hole slept. I whipped it out and jacked it slowly so that I would last the entire watch. It helped with entertainment and staying awake, plus we all know we can hear everything when we're jacking off.
Via ckydmk
Got a blowjob during the middle of a game of mini-putt. That shit was awesome
Via 5k1895
Okay, here goes. No throwaway for me. One time while I was mowing the lawn I realized I really had to piss. Like really badly. I thought about going inside, but then I was like, "I should just piss out here". So I did. But I was frightened from possibly being caught, and for some reason this gave me a boner. A fear boner. After I was done, I still had the boner. Not only that, but I was really fucking horny. I looked around to make sure no one was paying attention, and then whipped out my dick and jerked that thing hard. Just right there in my yard. Where any of my neighbors could have seen me. I came, and it was one of the most incredible orgasms I've ever had. Surprisingly enough, no one saw anything. I wouldn't recommend doing this, though. You might get the cops called on you.
TL;DR: Stopped mowing the lawn to piss, got horny and jacked off in full view of anyone who could have passed by.
Via NovaRunner
In the back of an M113 armored personnel carrier. Did the horizontal bop with my then-girlfriend, now wife.
Also did it in the hallway of our apartment building, and on my boss's desk (two different bosses, actually). But the M113 was definitely the most unusual.

Via RayBrower
If I have stayed the night in your house, I've rubbed one out.

Via Karma_Control
Let's just say I found the "Beyond" section in Bed, Bath & Beyond.

Via: SecondGuy:
You had sex with Christopher Walken?

Via zbn38
1 Sex. Mile high club. Economy class. Bathroom. Flight NYC to Seoul, Korea Air. With GF, not a random hookup.
2 Years later. Sex with GF in ocean, both clinging to bamboo pontoons of banka boat in Philippines floating over 60 feet of crystal clear water above reef while the boat captain napped (or pretended to nap) inside.
3 Received BJ while driving around old neighborhood and old high school years after graduated. Yeah, I thought, I made it, big time.

Via NotoneFrick
Before I ever discovered r/nofap I tried on my own to quit masturbating. I quit for about three weeks, then I went to mexico. I decided to catch a movie, and upon arriving, realized that the movie wouldn't start for another hour at least. So I went in the bathroom to take a dump. After I had finished, I looked at my penis. It seemed to look at me, with one unfaltering eye of judgement. I had abandoned him. I had left him all alone. I immediately started masturbating like crazy and came with the intensity of 94 suns.
Edit: I suppose you're correct, Mexico doesn't make much of a difference. However, I've always felt that I'm at my horniest when it's the hottest outside, AKA summertime Mexico. As someone who lives in Seattle, the weather difference was a bit of a biological shock.
Via MyDickIsAPotato
When I was about 14 I had an extremely long bus ride with very few kids on it. One day there was some sort of event or something and I was the only one on the bus for an hour and a half. Anyways I was really bored and I had just googled boobs on my flip phone and figured why not- hid myself under my sweater and went to town. I swear my bus driver knew what was going down. I was in the back seat, and I was trying to make sure he couldn't see me in that mirror thing and i was completely covered so I don't think he saw, but I'm pretty sure we made eye contact and his face just told me he knew I was up to something freaky. Also the post-masturbatory shame was immense when I had to ball up my sticky sweater and hide it in my backpack and come to terms with the fact that I just did that.
TL;DR jacked it while staring in my bus drivers eyes

Via notafather2002
My grandma used to live in Westminster, CA. She lived right behind an elementary school and I'd usually scale the school's fence to explore the playgrounds, play on the swings, etc.
One day, I decided to explore the campus and I decided to randomly try and open up the school's office- to my surprise, the door was unlocked. I let myself in, no alarm sounded, someone probably had left in a hurry... or would be coming back, no fucks given.
I made my way to one of the offices and just sat there. And then it hit me, let's masturbate. So I did, I jerked it and enjoyed myself for about 5 minutes. I hadn't thought about finding any tissues so I just came on the floor. Right in the middle of the room.
I just merrily walked out.

Via hillbillyabroad
My buddy masturbated in the White House bathroom during a high school field trip. He still brags about it. And his name, swear to God, is Jed.

Via lulzcakes
I was 15 at the time, watching TV inside a partly broken treehouse with my then "girlfriend". I put girlfriend in quotations because we couldn't really date each other, so we were mostly just friends with benefits (as in hand-holding action). An ad for Girls Gone Wild came on while we were watching Comedy Central, and things started to heat up. I mentioned how I had never seen boobs in real life. My GF turned around and took off her shirt without skipping a beat. I looked at her awkwardly for a bit and put my dick on them. She started rubbing my penis side-to-side with her boobs, and arms out kind of like an awkward penguin waddling around. This went on for about 10 minutes, and right as I came on her face, our mother climbed up the ladder and saw us. Thanksgiving was never the same again.

Via creutzfeldtz
I am afraid of planes, so I take Amtrak trains down to florida from new york.Anyways, i was about 15 at the time and me and my girlfriend just started having sex, and she went on the train with me down to florida with my mom.We were laying on the top bunk of the train and the trains door led directly out to the next train, because we had a handicapped room... She started blowing me and just as i was starting to finish the conductor of the train opened the door to welcome us, and witnesses my girlfriend get a hefty facial.TL;DR Amtrack Train and conductor watched me jizz of gfs face.

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